Unlocking Motivation | ep188
We recently celebrated 4 years of Wholehearted Coaching: The Podcast
And honestly, I was shocked.
Who recorded 4 years of episodes? It certainly wasn’t me. How did I even do that?
This got me thinking about motivation.
What creates motivation?
Why do some people stay motivated?
I think we often believe that motivated people have something intrinsically that makes them that way, that makes it so much easier for them.
But love, they have no inner gene or trait that’s different than what you have.
So, what creates our sense of self-motivation?
Today, I want to share with you what has worked for me and the 5 key factors that we need to create and cultivate motivation for ourselves.
Before we dive in…
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How I stayed motivated to record a podcast for 4 years
Listen, I love our podcast.
I absolutely love the Wholehearted community and the podcast is such a great way to connect with you and speak with you 1:1 each and every week.
And, there are times when I really don’t want to do stuff for the podcast.
Sometimes, I don’t feel inspired. Sometimes, I feel I have nothing insightful to say.
Because, well, I’m human, right?
And what’s tricky about this is that the podcast is a weekly show. Each and every week of the year.
So what has really helped me keep this thing that I love going for 4 years and still love it?
it doesn’t sound pretty but…
This has become a habit for me.
What I do in my podcast process has become an instinctual thing for me. We don’t often realize that motivated people are doing just that.
Most of us don’t always want to do something.
But, we choose to do them. We choose the hard thing. And it becomes a habit.
Motivation isn’t some magical thing that shows up or that other people have more than others. It begins with a choice.
A choice of doing something outside of your zone of comfort.
And then, continually choosing it again and again.
At the beginning, it’s a hard choice to make. But, the more and more you do it, it becomes this thing that’s ingrained in you.
It’s a choice you make each and every day.
5 Factors that Create and Cultivate Motivation
So when it comes to creating and cultivating motivation in our lives, these are the 5 factors that I believe really helped me and help other motivated people to get and stay motivated.
1 ) Know your deep soul-filled Why
Knowing your Why is all about going really deep within yourself. It’s about feeling connected to the heart of the thing that you want to do.
So, with Wholehearted Coaching: The Podcast, I could have this Why:
To promote my work and show people my skills as a coach.
Honestly, that doesn’t excite me at all. it’s not a Why that would make and keep me wanting to show up to sit at my desk each and every week to do this work.
Now, if I dig deeper, I could find this Why:
I record this podcast to hopefully make someone out there feel less alone, to make them feel less lost, to make them feel just a little more strong, resilient, and capable within themselves.
I record this podcast because I truly want you to believe that anything is possible, that you can reach your dreams, and you can go beyond.
I record this podcast as a love letter to my former self at the beginning of my growth journey trying to seek wisdom and knowledge that would allow me to feel better, more grounded, and to find myself.
This podcast is a love letter to who I used to be.
Now, love. Ooh.
Can you see the difference in those Why’s? Even as I write this, it feels so much more compelling and makes me want to show up each and every week.
When it comes to finding your deep soul-filled Why, you’ll know when you’ve found it when something inside just shifts and changes energetically. It’s like electricity or this buzz that just makes you want to take action, head out the door, and grab that microphone!
2) Get intimate with your fear
Motivated people are not fearless. Nobody is fearless. Instead, motivated people see their fear, they understand their fear, and they are able to navigate their fear.
They don't allow their fear to talk them out of doing the thing, or at least to talk them out of doing the thing for too long.
They don't try to bypass their fear because they know that fear is going to catch up to them.
Instead, they sit down with their fear and they have conversations with it.
They understand why their fear may be there and they let their fear know that it's okay.
Now, it may sound ridiculous to talk to your fear in that way, but it works so well.
If you’d like to explore fear further, check out episode 169 | Facing your Biggest Fears.
3) Don’t overstretch yourself
So, you’re probably thinking, “But Shirin, motivated people are doing so much!” You’re right, they get shit done. But what I’ve found to be true about this capability is that they utilize what’s called The Goldilocks Rule.
The Goldilocks Rule states that humans experience peak motivation when working on a task that is right at the edge of their current abilities.
It's not too hard. It's not too easy. It's just right.
This idea comes from the book Atomic Habits, but I have been calling the Goldilocks Rule “Sweet Spot Goals” forever (which you can check out in episode 176). https://www.wholehearted-coaching.com/podcast/set-goals-and-achieve-them-best-of-whc
The concept of these type of goals allows you to move toward that future you desire while also honoring the person you are here today.
This goal lies at the intersection of who you are today and where you want to be in the future.
Oftentimes we create goals that are just a little bit too big for us. While we do want to challenge ourselves, when it comes to motivation, it’s all about finding the balance.
So, if you find yourself losing motivation, maybe your goal bit off just a little more than you could chew right now. Maybe you need to break it down into smaller goals.
4) Be compassionate
Motivated people are so self-compassionate. When they mess up, when they make a mistake, maybe when they miss a day or even a week of doing that thing, they're still really kind to themselves.
They don't judge themselves. They don't pack on the shame and the blame.
They just allow themselves to be, to feel whatever they're feeling.
How motivating would it be if the most loving person in your life spoke to you when you were not feeling so motivated in a mean, unkind, and judgmental way?
Now, unfortunately some of us have experienced that. They think that speaking to and motivating us in this way is really going to help, but it doesn’t.
It's the same with ourselves.
Kindness is what allows us to be resilient, to sustain, to keep going.
I truly believe that self-compassion, self-kindness is one of the most important things when it comes to sustainability, ability, to productivity, resilience.
Self-compassionate people get shit done because when they mess up, they don't spend hours, days, weeks, years holding it against themselves.
If you want to explore this powerful mindset tool further, check out episode 151 | Self-Compassion
5) A supportive community
Self-motivated folks have a really supportive community.
That community can be of one or that community could be of many, but the company that you keep really affects how motivated you are.
Studies have shown that 95% of our actions and behaviors are motivated by the company we keep.
If you have folks around you who are cheering you on, who are also choosing hard things every day, they're seeing things through, and they're getting things done, that is incredibly motivating.
Conversely, if you have a community around you who isn't so supportive and positive, who you don't feel comfortable sharing things with, who maybe aren't challenging or stretching themselves a whole lot, that's not as motivating.
Being really intentional with the people you surround yourself with is so important.
And creating this type of community can take some time and some real intentional work. And it’s absolutely possible.
But if you find yourself here thinking “I don’t have that community…” then love, let me be your community. Let the podcast be your community.
One of the biggest reasons why this podcast grows and thrives is because of this community. It is such a supportive group.
And love, community is key.
So if you are feeling down about a goal or project that you haven’t been able to follow through on, I hope there was something in this that could help you to unlock that motivation.
Because the world needs your magic. The world needs that dream that only you can dream.
Tune into the podcast to hear the full episode — 188 | Unlocking Motivation
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