When we think about our future, it’s easy to get caught up in the specifics.

We create vision boards, set goals, and map out plans to achieve all the things we want. But what if I told you that the true secret to creating the future you deeply desire isn’t about the “what”? It’s not about what you want to do or achieve—

it’s about how you want to feel

Today, I’m sharing a simple yet powerful reframe that changed everything for me, my life, and my clients. It’s a formula that allows us to open up to the endless possibilities and step into a future that feels aligned with who we truly are. And trust me, it’s not a secret formula meant to be out of reach—it’s something you can apply right now to create a life beyond what you could ever imagine.

Let Go of Rigid Plans and Open Up to the Unimaginable

For so long, I thought I had to stick to a rigid plan for my life. I believed that in order to succeed, I had to map out every step, every goal, every accomplishment.

But what I’ve learned through my journey is that life rarely follows a linear path. And when we cling too tightly to a specific outcome, we often limit ourselves to what we think is possible, rather than what’s truly meant for us.

The life I live now—being a life coach, working from anywhere in the world, spending time with my family, and having the freedom to design my own days—was never something I thought was possible for me. If I had stuck to my original plan, I’d still be living a very restricted version of life, one that looked good on paper but didn’t feel fulfilling in my soul.

The key to unlocking the future that is truly yours lies in opening yourself up to the unimaginable. It’s about allowing yourself to dream bigger than what you’ve been told is possible.

And it starts with a simple shift in focus.

Focus on How You Want to Feel, Not What You Want to Do

Traditionally, we’re taught to focus on the “what”—what we want to do, what we want to achieve, what we want to have. But the problem with this approach is that it can lead to a life that looks amazing from the outside but feels unfulfilling on the inside.

I know this firsthand from my time as an opera singer.

At the height of my opera career, I was achieving everything I had set out to do. I was performing on big stages, living the dream I had written about in my journals.

But something was missing. Even though I had accomplished everything I thought I wanted, I felt miserable and disconnected.

The turning point for me was realizing that the “what” wasn’t the answer.

The real key to fulfillment is focusing on the “how”—how do I want to feel?

The truth is, the feelings we desire—joy, fulfillment, love, freedom—aren’t byproducts of our achievements. They are the foundation.

When we focus on how we want to feel, we create a future that is aligned with our deepest desires, not just what looks good on paper.

Breaking Free of the Box of Possibility

So much of what we believe is possible for ourselves is shaped by the world around us. We grow up with certain ideas of what a successful life looks like, what a stable relationship should be, what a good career entails. These ideas create a “box of possibility” that can feel incredibly limiting.

For years, I lived inside this box without even realizing it. I believed that relationships were supposed to be difficult, that careers were supposed to be hard, and that life was supposed to be about compromise. I didn’t know there was another way.

But when I shifted my focus to how I wanted to feel—when I let go of the rigid plans and opened myself up to the unimaginable—I broke free of that box. And that’s when my life transformed. I became a life coach, a path I never envisioned for myself. And now, I live a life that feels expansive, aligned, and full of possibility.

The Secret Formula: Feelings First, Plans Second

So what’s the secret formula? It’s simple: focus on how you want to feel first, and let your plans come second. When you start with the feelings you want to experience—whether it’s joy, freedom, love, or fulfillment—you create a future that aligns with your deepest desires. The “what” will naturally follow.

This doesn’t mean abandoning your goals or plans. It means approaching them from a place of alignment with your true self. When you focus on feelings first, you give yourself permission to evolve, change direction, and open up to new possibilities. And that’s where the magic happens.

Embrace the Unimaginable

The future you desire might not be something you can even imagine right now. And that’s okay. The unimaginable is where true possibility lies. By focusing on how you want to feel, you create space for something even greater than you can currently envision. Maybe it’s becoming a life coach. Maybe it’s moving to a new country. Maybe it’s something completely unexpected.

Whatever it is, I encourage you to embrace the unimaginable and trust that when you align with your feelings, you’ll create a future that is not only fulfilling but also uniquely yours.

So, as you move forward, ask yourself: How do I want to feel? And let that guide your next steps.

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About your host, Shirin Eskandani